A major take home from the Leadership Exchange Programme at Jela’s Development Initiative (JDI) is that there is a road THROUGH success and not necessarily TO success. So, now I see success not just as a destination but as a process to that place I define it to be.
Therefore, in my journey through success, I have decided to pen down what I am willing to give up, so help me God.
1. Fear: My fear of everything; my fear to start, to do, the fear of failure, the fear to be seen and recognized because people tend to amplify your shortcomings, the fear of mediocrity and sometimes my fear of how people view me. It is not only not fair to myself that I let this fear envelope me but it is also crippling to me and has a tendency to stagnate and delay my journey through success and to move forward I must move past it.
2. Anxiety: This is easily an extension of the first point. I’m always so anxious about my now; constantly wondering if I’m doing enough, even when I am or even when people sing my praise, I just can’t see what the hype is about. I worry too much about the future. I keep asking myself, “Will I make it? Will this life I’ve envisioned for myself happen?”
It just needs to stop. Anxiety is as crippling as fear and I must be anxious for nothing, being aware and present in my now and plan as adequately for the future in order to influence my journey.
3. Constant comparison of myself with others: Even I realize how futile this is. It does not only fuel fear and anxiety but it has the tendency to foster envy for no just cause. Success is different for everyone and I know I must first define what success is and what it means to me first so that when I take stock of my success, I have my definition to refer to and not someone else’s journey to compare with. It helps me stay focused, authentic, and original in building my best self.
4. My Need for total control: I’m laughing as I write this because the year 2020 was such a humbling year that taught me that I cannot control everything. There will always be some uncertainty but instead of letting it fuel anxiety in me I have learnt the importance of compartmentalizing my circle of concern and influence to better deal with my need for control.
6. The Bubble: The bubble is my comfort zone that I fear could somehow slip into being comfortable with mediocrity and the bare minimum and that’s unacceptable to me because I know I am called to be excellent at whatever I do.
As I was charged by Angela Ochu-Baiye to think on these things and pen them down. I charge YOU, to think on these things, pen them down and stick to the commitment. Good luck!